You've come a long way, baby

long-way-baby
Originally uploaded by Violet Chrome.

So, my last post made me rustle up this 1984 Virginia Slims ad. Read their THEORY on women's evolution:

"According to the THEORY OF EVOLUTION, men evolved with fat, stubby fingers and women evolved with long, slim fingers. Therefore, according to the THEORY OF LOGIC, women should smoke the long, slim cigarette designed just for them. And that's the THEORY OF SLIMNESS."

Ah, I JUST LOVE Virginia Slims's LONG-WAY THEORY. According to these SCIENTIFIC GENIOUSES, becoming a smart, sassy and genious bitch is simple. Alls you have to do is start smoking and stop eating, and your IQ will automatically increase.

Who needs a good job or a good education? With Ms. Virgina's LONG-WAY THEORY, all you need to become a fully-realized, completely logical woman is a smoking party dress and long fingers. Hand me my Nobel Peace Prize, Virginia, because I'm following your LOGIC.

Wait, I'm thinking too much, it's making my mind tingle... Wait, it's because I haven't eaten in weeks trying to shoe-horn myself into this fabulous new dress... Wait, it's the 80s, maybe I should die my silk shoes to match. I've come so far.