Vespa and Sears bastard child...

The Pa's a car buff, so is the Uncle. And in my lame attempt to talk "old cars" with the males in the family, I mentioned that a co-worker of mine owns a beautiful '63 Vespa Scooter, which is an elegant light grey with white detailing.

So the Uncle excitedly pipes up (but directs his response toward dear old dad), "Remember back in Saskatchewan? They sold Vespa scooters at Simpsons-Sears under the name 'Allstate'?"

Well, my comment failed to get me into the boy's club, but they did spark me with an excellent hipster item that just screams violet: a ghetto version of a vespa. Now that's sort of my ride, don't you think?

I want one. A Simpsons-Sears "Allstate Cruisaire" — that'd make for some heavy ICRS* points.

*Indie Credibility Rating System: those who are seen at the coolest live shows, have the freshest do, and mix with the right people; those who are eternally hunting cool points to flavour them hiper-than-thou, in this here illusion-of-the-moment lifestyle. I use ICRS with all the irony I can muster, but I still play the game... just with monopoly money.